JERRY BROWN vs. THE COLOR PURPLE

By Andy Bandit

You know how I knew the Lakers were blowing out the Celtics last night in Game 6 of the NBA Finals?  It wasn’t just because I heard prolonged screaming outside my window and nobody was calling the cops.  It was ‘cause all the Boston fans were out at their Summer League game.  Let’s see, for Purple, Goat was there.  Tim Leavitt was there.  Professor and Smeagol were there.  And for Brown, Keegan and Martha were …. um…. wait.  Oh, that’s right, they weren’t there.  In fact, get this.  Keegan sent out an email to his team saying something came up, and so sorry he couldn’t make it to the game.  And then two minutes later, he sends out an email to some friends inviting them over to his place to watch the Celtics/Lakers game.  But apparently he didn’t check his cc list because there was crossover on the two emails.  Woops.  Busted!!!  Sorry big guy, had to call you out on that one.   Too funny not to.

Well, to be fair, the Uhls were hardly the only ones missing for Jerry Brown (0-2) in their game against The Color Purple (2-0) last night.  Brown was playing with just 8 players, 3 of them men, and all of their top drafted men weren’t there.  I looked at the situation, and assumed this was a clear blow out.  I mean, c’mon, Brown lost last week 15-5, and Purple won their game.  How could Brown possibly expect to win this in a near savage situation? This question proves how little I know about frisbee.

Purple took the opening pull, and Brown immediately slapped on the zone, which they would be playing all game long understandably.  It looked to work right off the bat as Crissy Vega snared a block, then after a turnover Rho had a sick layout D.  But Brown couldn’t put it in, and the point lasted forever.  3 points were scored in the Men’s league game on the other field before Tim mercifully hit Smeagol in the center of the field to make it 1-0 Purple.

Brown came back, Rho hitting Ines Noto with an up-the-line forehand to tie it 1-1.  This would be the theme of the night for Brown.  Their ladies were sensational and carried this team.  Rho scored the next point on a 20 yard flick from Randy Sanchez.  Brown 2-1.  Purple counters.  Tim pulls down a sweet grab and hits Spike down the middle to tie it 2-2.  Rho finds Crissy sprinting to the back of the endzone, 3-2 Brown.  Then off a turn, Rho to Crissy in the corner and its 4-2.   Purple calls a time out to figure out how this is happening.

It turns out, Brown was employing two separate zones.  A sort of 4-person cup alignment and the old Marshall Wall (yes, I’ve given it a capital W) which Randy knew well from his many years playing it on those mediocre winter league teams.  They toggled between the two effectively enough to keep them in the game well into the 2nd half.

Off the time-out, Brown scored again after Rho had another sick D, and Randy hit Greg Dale on a cross-field pass, 5-2.  At 5-3, James Lumsden found Crissy right at the front of the end zone, who bobbled it, caught it, threw it to Greg, who bobbled it, and dropped it.  But Crissy suddenly looked at her feet and realized she was in the endzone before her pass, so the score counted, 6-3.  The 11th edition strikes again.

They traded points, finishing with Powski’s high arching forehand to Professor to make it 7-4, and Brown took their first strategic time-out, not to actually discuss strategy, but to take a much needed rest before half.  Unfortunately for them, the rest benefitted Purple, who scored three straight to tie the game at 7’s.  And it included the circus catch by Naye Saldana after Spike got a D, as it fell onto Naye’s back, and somehow mysteriously found its way into her hands.  I’m not ruling out the dark arts.  Professor finished that point with a short pass to Marla Potterveld, rocking the 80’s side ponytail (along with Criqet).  Gotta love the attention to detail on the theme.  Brown finally stopped the bleeding, Bryanne hitting Greg on a crossing pattern, and Brown took half 8-7.

The 2nd half continued where it left off for Brown.  The Fab 8 scoring twice to make it 10-7.  Purple answers with two of their own, 10-9.  Then Rho sends a 50-yard huck to Randy, who outreads the taller defender, and threads a perfect pass to Zip in traffic, 11-9.

And then….. Purple figured out the zone.

Spike bullets a laser to Tim streaking down the right side for big yardage on the way to 11-10.  Then a Brown turn.  Then Ginger winds up a huge back-hand to find Tim once again sprinting past the wings which leads to easy passes and we’re tied at 11’s.  Tim was finding holes like Ron Jeremy at a pool party.  And then, Purple absolutely shreds another Brown zone, finishing with Professor’s pass to Leland and Purple took the first lead of the game since it was 1-0.

It looks like another Brown turnover as Rho hucks it deep to Zip, not noticing the poach by Spike.  But Spike hasn’t learned the adage of catching your D’s, and ends up macking it to Zip, who clearly wasn’t expecting that to happen, and dropped it to the chorus of groans from the Men’s League players who were on a time-out in their own close game, but who had to check out
the Co-ed action during their break.  The point finishes with Goat sending a wild forehand 30 yarder to Leland, who outjumps the D, bobbles it, and finally hauls it in to make it 13-11 Purple.  Goat exclaims “I didn’t deserve that one, I’m coming out.”

But Brown hasn’t led this long to suddenly bend over and take it in the end.  After Zip barely misses a lei-out score, Brown recovers on yet another Rho block (I think she had 100 last night) and hits Zip to make it 13-12.  A couple turns on both sides.  Nice blocks by Randy on Brown and Marla on Purple.  Tim scores it with a short pass to his doppelganger Brian Holmes.  14-12.  Brown’s final time-out.

For the last few points I kept turning around expecting Keegan to suddenly appear between the trees like in that famous Big Foot video.  I imagined him running towards the field, ripping off his shirt, revealing a red S and flying in to save the day, and then making out with Margot Kidder.  But it was not to be.  On the final point, a pass just missed Crissy in the corner for the last possession Brown would get.  Spike rifled a lovely, just lovely pass to Naye to break through the zone.  Then Ginger finished the game with a hammer to Spike.  Purple won 15-12.

Kudos to Brown for an amazingly well fought game despite playing near savage, and being forced to play 3/4 all game against some 4/3.  Kudos to Leland, who in week 2 has already topped the number of wins he had last year in Men’s League.  And kudos to the side ponytail.  Hot.

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